knnbccb!!! ah beng chia tio scratched!!! F**K!

KNNBCCB!!! morning going work that time see my swee chia tio defaced!!! doesnt look like some jealous people purposely scratch it one though, more like dunno which blur f**k bak chiu gor sai (paste shit on eyes) open door never see, anyhow. CCB!! like to gor sai so much might as well jiak sai (eat shit) la!!

ok ok, gao liao gao liao, enough outburst of naked expletives oredi... so how har, should i or should i not go fix it? any good workshops to recommend bor??

peekture of the moment - 27 june 2006

dai ee dog (大耳 dog)

last nite went lim jiu (drink alcohol) with colleague then this morning niah niah, lmc send out e-大字報 to chase money. wah sibeh efficient manz, that gal... last time hor, the 大耳隆 (aka dai ee long or loanshark) liked to 挂豬頭 (hang pig head) to 'encourage' the debtors to pay money. but office mah, must civilise a bit, use her dai ee dog instead. haha!!

o$p$ - learn this from some professional dai ee long one. stands for owe money pay money. dunno who they are la just so happen that got 1 neighbor keeps getting this written all over the corridor la, lift la, his house door la at my block. nowadays they also cut cost isit, write less so use less ink. haha...

i see cars smiling at me?!!

alamak! yesterday go see Cars - not the ah beng chia kind la, i mean the movie - then when i go to my ah beng chia in the carpark that time hor, wah lau ay... see those cars there and i thought can see eyes and lips on them manz! can almost see them smiling and talking!! wah lau... can see on my car also!!! scary manz... heehee...

go watch, go watch.

peektures from the almost-one-month-wear-green tour

finally got my fingers working to push mouse and post my peektures from my oversea ict. dun worry la, not gonna post those uncle-with-belly-still-act-macho sexy-hunk-in-jungle-fatigue kinda peektures. for those, go see army ads, they should have alot.

bird eggs

camp buddy spotted this nest with 3 little eggs on one of the trees inside camp. very small niah niah. dunno wat kind of bird la, about sparrow size but got green feature one.

by the time we leave camp to go rnr, the eggs already hatched liaoz. cant really tell from the peekture hor? nor... that brown color ball-like thingy in the nest lor. mah jiam alien head like that, haha!

arhh... not relatives of the birdies above la dun worry. just a nite market stall selling fried quail eggs la. but wah lau ay, the sunny side up sibeh kawaii le!!

4 days 3 nites under the stars cemetery stay, ai mai?

the signboard to the columbarium where we spent a few days and nites at. this kind of kang tao where to find?? heehee... actually didnt stay in the columbarium la. we were just outside the main gate of the building. at nite hor, the caretaker goes home he got lock the gate mah. somemore the place got security camera and motion detector one ok. dont pray pray eh.

got one nite dunno why the security alarm went off. then later got one security guard drove up and came to look see somemore. wahlau ay... columbarium also need so tight security meh??

the caretaker hor he very nice one, day time can go inside to siam the sun. and somemore let us use his kettle to boil water cook instant noodle. got 1 time even drove some of us to town to buy dinner. heehee...

kooning there no problem one ok. got the tua pek gong lookalike god to protect you. me dunno he is simi god la. me only know of tua pek gong niah niah so... anyway no fish, shrimp also can la... por bi por bi... heehee!

and then hor, morning you wake up, can see this lor, whole hill of graves!! that patch in the distance is actually pineapples. the caretaker told us the native pineapples very nice. err... thank you har!

those sticks in front hor... are not fishing rods ok!

reservists' guide to getting rid of pesky flies

Step 1: take a piece of sticky paper and put on the ground. go to koon, leaving the sticky paper there for 1/2 to 24 hours. for better result, take sticky paper and chase after flies.

Step 2: take sticky paper and pose for the camera. make sure the trapped flies smile also!

Step 3: burn sticky paper for warmth. the nite can be quite cold you know!!

other interesting peektures

lelong lelong! lilliputian size jeans! buy 1 big get 10 small free! heeheee...

wah they also got sell liulian (durian) there siah, me is very the surprised le!! somemore they are bigger than the D24 we have in s'pore but me din try, so dunno nice or not. hmm... but at least i now know, liulian dont grow in polyfoam box one. jus kiddin' la...

heh... if only nike ads are also so tasty!

this is a taxi ad, very blur because the cab moving mah... here here, let me try to make out what it said har...

火車站前
8樓麗晶酒店
xx 超低價制服辣妹
300 xx xx 650
[cant make out the line in yellow]
[next line also...]

well, you get the idea...

peekture of the moment - 20 june 2006

last weekend went siu jwee (swim) then swim finish liao, come back to my ah beng chia then see this couple making out on my car! wah lau ay... i stood outside they thought i transparent one, wtf!!! but i nice ah beng la, people in the heat feeling sibeh song i also dun wanna disturb mah... so i take peekture lor, then post on blog lor, muahahahahaha!!!...
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... peekture perperly 'blurred' to protect the fuckers innocent.
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bzzzz... yeh baby! kimochi... bzzzzzz...

Update on June 20, 2006: wah lau ay i post naughty peekture only, got people write comments. ok la, next time post more naughty peektures. haha!

got people say too blur cannot see, must draw circle. got people say camera beng boi zun focus wrongly... ok la, i post another naughty pic let you people see la. click here, click here, heehee...

zhng my browser

obviously i not talking abt IE here lor. that stupid browser come integrated with WinXP one, so boring... i am talking about Mozilla browsers like Firefox and Mozilla Suite. mozilla browsers can zhng one you know? me not talking about make the browser look swee swee like changing skins/themes that kind of zhng ok, but really making it do more things than it does by default ala chut power! haha!!

now i only know of 2 ways to zhng the browser la, next time if found anymore i post more lor. heres how:

bookmarklet
you can use this to submit to a web form such as search Google, Wikipedia etc from your browser's location bar. so like that, you save on having to first going to the website then enter the search keyword. you can do it for any form with 1 input field. i havent try with multiple fields la, so dunno if it works or not. heres how to create one for Wikipedia:

1. create a bookmark to the URL "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Search?search=%s" and give it a name, say "Wikipedia Quick Search".
2. go to Bookmarks -> Manage Bookmarks, right click on the bookmark you just created and click on Properties.
3. In the Keyword field, key one or more lowercase letters, e.g. "w".
4. Click OK and exit the Bookmark Manager.

to perform a search, on the location bar, type "w YOUR_SEARCH_QUERY" without the quotes and press Enter. YOUR_SEARCH_QUERY denotes your search keyword.

can create one for other website also by replacing the URL. heres what i have so far:

• Answers.com - http://www.answers.com/main/ntquery?s=%s
• Goggle - http://www.google.com/search?q=%s
• Wikipedia - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Search?search=%s

also read this to see how you can create bookmarklet for other browsers.

extensions
extensions are small add-ons that add new functionality to your browser. e.g. mozImage turns your browser into an image browser; Image Zoom allows you to zoom in and out of any webpage's images. can go to https://addons.mozilla.org/ to see got what extensions available. installation also very easy one, jus click on the Install Now link in the page niah niah. most extensions can work on both mozilla and firefox.

me got use these extensions:

• Extension Manager - allows you to manage your extensions. want to install must also think about uninstalling mah!
  
• Habari Xenu - a news aggregator/reader that supports RSS, Atoms, RDF syndicate feeds. wanna install Sage one (suppose to be a better feed reader), but it doesnt work on mozilla.
• HTML Validator - adds HTML validation functionality to your browser. only if you are interested in the codes behind your nice webpage la!
• IE Tab - opens a IE session (for crying out loud!!) within mozilla window. bopians some stupid websites discriminate against non-IE users (aka jedi) neber do their webpages properly for other browsers.
• IE View - opens your current page in IE. was using this before i found IE Tab.
• Image Zoom - controls the size of images displayed in a web page. handy if you browse sites with big big images. hee!
• Reload Every - automatically reloads a webpage after a certain time interval. i use it on Yahoo! Singapore Finance.
• User Agent Switcher - lets you switch the identity of your browser to 'fool' the web server. usually used to get around those lagi stupid websites that ask you to use IE if not cannot view their websites. can see i go to great length NOT to suck up to the evil empire. haha!
• wmlbrowser - for browsing WAP sites.
  

have fun zhng'ing your browser la!

every breath you take - a parody by Columbia Business School students

last time i blamed alan greenspan for the dotcom bust (i still do). now i sibeh boi song ben bernanke for vaporising my paper gain... haiz, but what can a ah beng do but laugh about it?

you can also view the video from here.

money can really buy you happiness!

from lil' sis's broker's daily lobang email...

Money Can Really Buy You Happiness ! It is official. Economists at the University of Warwick in England have discovered in their research that a simple injection of cash is all that it takes to make you HAPPY. However, to shift an average person from the bottom of the happiness scale to the top will need to take a cool S$1 Million Dollars. The research also revealed that a small amount of S$1000 can also perk you up temporarily for a short thrill.

But it is stress that money is not necessarily the easiest route to contentment. A Happy Marriage is the equivalent of S$100,000 a year and Good Health is worth S$300,000 a year. While the Misery of Unemployment cannot be alleviated for less than S$60,000 a year. The survey also found that women tended to be happier than men and that happiness follows a U-shaped pattern in our lives; that is from the time we were borned, it slopes downwards to a nadir in our thirties, then things start to improves from our forties onwards.

A Person Is Considered Successful In Heavenly Term, If He Can Get Up In The Morning And Get Down To Bed At Night, And In Between Does What He Wants To Do. There Are About 1% Of The World Population Out There Each Day, Aren't Able To Do Just That. So Try Living Each Day As If It Is Your Last, Because Someday You May Be Right......

wonder why women tend to feel happier than men...